A Turd That Won’t Flush

The free agency period has begun. 

The arbitration deadline has come and gone. 

Everybody who is in any way interested in the great game of baseball now waits with great anticipation to see where the big names will fall. 

Jeter.  Rivera.  Werth.  Crawford.  Lee.  Upton.  Greinke.  Ramirez.  The list is long.

Some bigger names have already signed deals (Joaquin Benoit, Aubrey Huff), but did you know that 73 different players have signed free agent contracts thus far?  Most are of the minor league variety, but many names are familiar:

– Jay Gibbons (to the LA Dodgers)

– Justin Miller (to Seattle)

– Dallas McPherson (to the White Sox)

– Josh Barfield (to Philadelphia)

But one name in particular stood out.  I was so shocked and horrified to see his name that I practically pulled a Mama Cass and choked on my sandwich. 

My friends, on November 11th, the one-and-only Kevin Cash signed a minor league deal with the Texas Rangers.

Kevin Cash has been, and continues to be, a sore spot with me.  He was once the crown jewel of Toronto’s farm system, known as our “Catcher of the Future”.  But he was so bad, so terribly pathetic at the plate, that the future came to an end in three years.

Since that time I like to think of Cash as a turd that won’t flush.  He is a piece of crap that just won’t go away, coming so close, so many times to being out of baseball for good (full season in triple-A in 2006, a brief retirement in 2009), but popping back up shortly thereafter.

How he continues to find teams is beyond me, a miracle of modern day society.  His career stats are vomit inducing: .183 average, .248 OBP, .278 SLG, .526 OPS, 12 HR, 58 RBI, 195 K’s, in 641 AB over 8 seasons.

He has a career WAR of -3.6, meaning that a minor league player would have provided a team with almost four more wins than Cash. 

Yet somehow Kevin Cash is still a sought after commodity.  It would be less of a slap in the face if it was the Royals or Pirates who kept signing him.  But no – he has played for Tampa Bay, Boston (where he actually won a World Series in ’07), New York, and Houston.  Now it is the defending AL Champion Texas Rangers who bring him off the scrap heap.  Come on!

Maybe he wowed Texas with his new-found versatility – he pitched an inning for Houston last year (3 H, 1 ER). 

Maybe it was because he had the second greatest stretch of his career playing in the state of Texas (20 games, .204 average, .605 OPS, 2 HR).

Whatever the case may be, please MLB – stop recycliing Kevin Cash! 

And while you’re at it, do the same with Eric Hinske.

Yours truly,

500 Level Fan

ps. I don’t like Kevin Cash.

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