Classic Quotes From A “Superfan”

Attendance was low at the dome on Tuesday night, much lower than the first three games of the season.

But although the number of fans was down, the number of interesting fans was not.  One man in particular laid claim to being the man of the night.  His commentary was so ridiculous that we literally had to move sections to get away from him.

He was clad in a powder blue jersey and vintage mesh back cap.  He was with a girl, and from their interaction it looked like it was a new relationship, or a budding one.  In order to impress her he decided to deem himself the Superfan, and show off his vast expanse of baseball and Blue Jay related knowledge.

He failed.

Here are a few classic quotes from the Superfan.

“Why would Farrell scratch Bautista?  What kind of a manager is this guy?”  As a “Superfan” one would think that he would be aware of the fact that Jose will miss the entire series.  Apparently they don’t make superfans like they used to…

“Bautista would have had that!” This was directed at third baseman Jayson Nix after a ball got by his outstretched glove.  Again, as a Superfan one would expect him to be aware of the fact that Jose Bautista plays right field, and hasn’t played a major league game at third since mid-September of last season.

“Cito would have been out there arguing that!” (after a close call at second went against the Jays.) Never mind the fact that Cito rarely left the dugout, or the fact that not even the players closest to the play weren’t arguing.  The Superfan was MAD.

“Farrell sucks.  What a terrible manager.  First he scratched Bautista, and now he doesn’t even argue that?  Come on!”

“Get that in you Mo Fo!”  Because calling people mo fo’s makes you look cool in front of women…

“Get off your knees ump, you’re blowing the game!” Pure gold!

“You again ump?  Why?” After an Oakland infield single that the Superfan thought was an out.  He was wrong.  Badly.

All of the above happened before the end of the third inning,, at which point we had to move sections. 

Sadly, I didn’t get to see how successful his courtship turned out to be.  But judging by the fact that I kept seeing him in line for beer I can only assume not well.

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